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The Black Phone [movie]

 The Black Phone [movie] THIS IS PRETTY GOOD, BUT IT SEEMS LIKE IT WOULD BE THE BACKSTORY TO A HORROR VIDEOGAME. NOT EVEN LIKE THIS WOULD BE THE PLOT OF A HORROR VIDEOGAME (ALTHOUGH IT HAD SOME VERY "USE TOILET TANK ON WALL" "PUT DIRT IN PHONE" VIDEOGAME VERB NOUN LOGIC) BUT THIS FEELS LIKE THE BACKSTORY YOU'D PUT TOGETHER IN A DIFFERENT VIDEOGAME BY READING ALL THE NOTES. I DON'T KNOW HOW TO DESCRIBE THAT AS A TYPE OF WRITING. I THINK THE WAY IT HAPPENS IN LIKE SIX DISTINCT CHUNKS AND FEELS LIKE THE GRABBER BARELY CARES ABOUT ANYTHING AND JUST LEAVES EVERY TIME. PS. THIS MOVIE IS INSANE IN HOW MUCH IT THINKS 80S KIDS BEAT EACHOTHER UP. YOU ABSOLUTELY CAN NOT HIT SOMEONE IN THE HEAD WITH A GIANT ROCK LIKE THAT. 

Wicked [movie]

 Wicked [movie] I DON'T KNOW, I'VE BEEN ASKED IF I'VE SEEN THIS ONE MILLION TIMES AND WE ARE ON BACKLASH TO BACKLASH TO BACKLASH ON IF PEOPLE ARE SUPPOSED TO LIKE IT OR NOT AND IT'S JUST ON AMAZON PRIME SO I DECIDED TO WATCH IT. IT'S FINE AND I LIKE IT WHEN THEY USE ALTERNATE WORDS.  PS. IT'S REALLY LONG AND I HAD TO STOP IN THE MIDDLE TO ARGUE WITH SOMEONE IF AN EXTRA BLOODY THROUGH AND THROUGH WAS MAYBE MORE VOMIT DOLLS THAN SIDESHOW. 

Spooky Town [play]

 Spooky Town [play] I DIDN'T HATE IT. I UNDERSTOOD WHAT HAPPENED IN TERMS OF PLOT EVENTS. BUT I STILL FEEL LIKE I DIDN'T' *GET* THIS. LIKE IT WAS MISSING SOME ELEMENT TO MAKE IT NOT JUST A WEIRD THING THAT HAPPENED TYPE STORY. MEH? IT WAS THE MOST PLAY LIKE PLAY I'VE SEEN FROM FRIGID. IT HAD CHARACTERS AND SETS AND SCENES AND STUFF.  PS. 37 IS OLD

The Witching Hour [play]

 The Witching Hour [play] THIS WAS FIVE SHORT PLAYS. MY OPINIONS IN NO ORDER ARE: IT'S FUNNY THE NEIGHBOR HAD NOTHING IN ANY WAY INDICATING SHE WAS A GHOST AND THE PLAY DROPPED ANY AMBIGUOUS PREMISE INSTANTLY. THE WITCH ONE WAS PROBABLY THE BEST BUT I CAN'T TELL PEOPLE APART SO I COULDN'T FOLLOW IT. I LIKE THE JAPANESE GUY FORGOT THE PREMISE FOR LIKE 75% OF THE ACT. THE LAST ONE WAS SO BAD IT FELT LIKE AN AI MADE IT. BUT NOT EVEN LIKE, CHATGPT. LIKE A "I MADE AN AI WATCH 100 PLAYS, THIS IS WHAT IT MADE". ALSO HOOVERPHONIC, REMEMBER HOOVERPHONIC?  PS. ONE BILLION, FIVE HUNDRED MILLION, TWO HUNDRED THOUSAND AND FIFTY THREE. 

hyperbole and a half [book, comic]

 hyperbole and a half [book, comic] THE INTERNET RAN THIS SO FAR INTO THE GROUND I THINK I REFLEXIVELY HATE SEEING IT, BUT I RANDOMLY FOUND A COPY OF THE BOOK AND READ IT AND YEAH IT'S GOOD. THE DOG PARTS ARE WHATEVER, BUT THE REST IS REALLY WELL DONE AND WAY MORE SERIOUS THAN I THOUGH OF THIS AS BEING.  PS. I FEEL LIKE THE COMIC WAS ALWAYS VERY ADHD EXAMPLE BUT MAN IS THAT LADY AUTISTIC AS HECK

FruitHead [movie]

 FruitHead [movie] IT'S A 9 MINUTE HORROR MOVIE MADE BY GUSHERS FRUIT SNACKS. I HATE FALLING FOR MARKETING THINGS, AND IT'S NOT LIKE THIS WAS *SO* AMAZING, BUT LIKE, THEY MADE THIS ACTUALLY HIGH QUALITY ENOUGH THAT IT IS ACTUALLY AMAZING. LIKE THE CONCEPT THEY MADE THIS AND ACTUALLY PUT EFFORT INTO IT IS REALLY REALLY REALLY FUNNY.  PS. I DON'T FEEL LIKE I GET WHY HE WAS A STRAWBERRY AND NOT AN ORANGE? 

Popeye's Revenge [movie]

 Popeye's Revenge [movie] THESE PUBLIC DOMAIN CASH IN MOVIES ARE NEVER GOOD. I WOULD NEVER EXPECT THEM TO BE GOOD. BUT I DON'T GET WHY THEY ALL FEEL SO RUSHED. THEY KNOW WHEN THEY CAN RELEASE THEM LITERALLY A CENTURY IN ADVANCE. ALL SORTS OF OTHER BAD JUNK HORROR COMES OUT AND IS BAD AND JUNK BUT NEVER HAS THE "WE MADE THIS 5 MINUTES BEFORE IT WAS DUE" FEELING THESE HAVE.  PS. WHY WAS THIS MOVIE SO OBSESSED WITH TRACTORS AND MOWING? I ASSUME IT WAS JUST A THING THEY HAD ON THE LAND THEY RENTED, BUT NOTHING ABOUT POPEYE IS IS TRACTOR RELATED.